One of the things that I absolutely love about being a mom is the manner in which it has strengthened my relationship with my sisters. I have two big sisters who were always protective and nurturing of me, but they have rallied around me like none other since the moment I told them that I was pregnant. Quiet as it's kept, Little Sister has THREE mamas. :-) They have been so willing to share advice, crazy stories about labor and delivery, and the joys (and challenges) of raising seven phenomenal kids between the two of them. Recently, one of my sisters recommended that I check out the documentary Being Elmo. It's the story of Kevin Clash, the puppeteer behind the beloved Sesame Street muppet, Elmo. As her 20 year old stated, "I think every parent should have to watch this documentary in the hospital after they give birth.." It is absolutely phenomenal. After I finished watching it...and stopped sobbing...my sister and I had a long discussion about the core parenting principles that this film exemplified. As an attorney representing the interests of abused and neglected children, my sister has seen so many instances of when parenting goes horribly wrong, so this movie was a much needed break from her day-to-day reality of assisting troubled families. As she reflected on the movie, she wrote down her thoughts on parenting as it relates to this movie. Below are her reflections. THANKS SIS!
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I typically share my love of a movie or news article with my boys so that we can all eventually share in the experience. After watching the documentary “Being Elmo” I did the same. My 20 year old was the first to take me up on the offer to watch. He is in his third year of college and just finishing an engineering internship at General Dynamics. His first reaction was, “I think every parent should have to watch this documentary in the hospital after they give birth.” He continued, “That was the most inspirational movie I have ever seen.” I too enjoyed the movie, especially the part where “the real Elmo,” Kevin Clash, explained his father and mother’s reaction after he used his father’s coat to create his first puppet.
I penned a few nuggets of parenting wisdom that I took away from the film just in case a maternity ward somewhere wants to start showing the 1 hour 16 minute film:
- Recognize your child’s gift: Kevin tells us that his father’s reaction to his cut up coat was, ”Just ask the next time.” What was it that made Kevin’s parents’ reaction so mild? Why wasn’t their natural reaction rage or anger? Kevin’s parents not only understood their child’s gift of creativity, they also knew their power as parents – the power to strike down that creativity or to nurture it forward.
- Keep the dream alive: Get your child as close to their dream as possible. As Kevin tells the story, when he came home and told his mother he wanted to meet Kermit Love, she did not kill his aspiration by telling him she did not have the funds to take him on a trip to meet the famed puppeteer. What she did instead was track down Kermit Love to find out how she could further her child’s dream to meet him. She kept his dream alive, which eventually became real when Kevin went on a school trip to New York.
- Provide a legacy: When Kevin was “thrown” a chance to bring the lifeless body of Elmo to life, Kevin recognized it as an opportunity. He traveled home to find the spirit of Elmo and there he rediscovered his mother’s legacy of caring for children in her home daycare. Kevin realized that it was his mother’s legacy of love for children that he would use to create the Elmo that we now know and love.
- Spend time with your child while there is time to spend: The scene in the movie where Kevin Clash celebrates his daughter’s 16th birthday brings tears. Mr. Clash’s realization that he sacrificed time with his daughter while working as Elmo says it all.
- Pay it forward: Parents must be examples to their children and show them, not teach them, that everyone has something to contribute to society, no matter what our station in life and no matter how much money we have or don’t have. Kevin’s mentoring of aspiring puppeteers furthers Elmo’s legacy of love.
